New York, oct 24, five min til 9pm.

Get off a train to find the platform crowded. People staring down the tracks. They’re not just waiting for a slow train though. They have their phone cameras out and are taking pictures. Finally I stop to see for myself what obviously is happening. There is a shirtless man on the tracks arms in the air.

A woman asks me I say there is a man. She says I know but did the train stop. I look again and a train is stopped in the tunnel a few yards away. And the man looks so small.

Police are pushing their way through the wall of people who are still taking pictures. I begin to walk away.

I wonder if that man was hoping to end his life tonight and all others cared was that they could prove they were there to see it. So I go down one platform and all is calm nobody knows of the despair on display one track above.